Is college even right for me?

I have a simple, yet infinitely complex question for you.

From what you know about me, and through your experience,  is college right for me?

I'm really struggling with the quickly approaching deadlines. Most college applications are due next month. I just found this out a week or two ago by a lucky coincidence. I guess counselors aren't really doing their jobs? Anyway, the pressure is on to not only pick a college but decide if I even want to go at all.

At first I thought I might just take a year off, sort stuff out, take my time really traveling and picking with confidence. But I thought then I might be risking not wanting to go back to school at all, and I really do-did?-want to educate myself further.

But will four+ more years of school really help me become a better writer? Yes, I'm positive it will, but other things out there will too. Travel, simply experiencing and learning independently. College sounds amazing, but really I'm not the best at high school work-how can I expect myself to stack up to college level? If someone has a passion and doesn't mind not having a ton of money, shouldn't they do what they like?

Then there's an entirely different matter of me saving money by staying at my home uni or going out of state, transferring after two years, etc. But I won't get into that.

I'll admit it, I'm panicking a little here. I've always assumed I'd just go off to college like everyone else. Now I don't know. I know lots of people who are happy who have never set foot in a college, many of them are brilliant.
Maybe in a few years?




Why can't I just BE?


Any help is appreciated.